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About me. :3
Blog? - September 3, 2018
I had a realization recently. Ash, my best friend that passed away, her name is Ashley. My middle name is Ashley. I forgot about that, I haven't heard my middle name in so long. Although, it feels like she's so far away, having the same name makes it feel like a piece of her will always be with me. In the back of my mind though, I keep thinking maybe there are never coincidences. My mom said the nurses at the hospital picked my middle name, maybe that was supposed to be my middle name because of this. Idk maybe it is a big coincidence. My mind's just been running a lot, about everything. My sleep has been hit and miss because of it.

Something else I recently realized is Ash knew I collected Dr. Seuss, she gave me her cat in the hat bobblehead figurine thing. She also bought me a Christmas card years ago that had a Grinch ornament. I forgot until now but she gave me 1 or 2 Grinch stuffed animals. I can't remember if she gave me both.

On a different note, I started looking up arrhythmias because I've been told a couple times I have one. I'm wondering if it got worse almost 2 years ago. I read where it can cause fatigue, headaches, dizziness, lightheadedness, shortness of breath and chest pain. Before I started feeling like I was getting sick, I started having what I thought was a lot of asthma problems. I had to stop pt on my knees because of it. After a few months the "asthma" started getting better, they put me on a daily asthma medication. I have an allergic asthma. I have a lot of those symptoms. It could seriously make sense. I kept feeling super dizzy and in February of last year it felt like I was about to pass out twice in the store. I've been starting to feel dizzy, chest pain and "asthma" like lately. I have a headache but I know most of it is from the occipital neuralgia on the right side. The problem is, when I do an ekg or something I, unconsciously and uncontrollably, go into a meditative breathing. That's probably why it's normally always sounding fine to drs. My old Dr only noticed it when I came in flustered about something that had happened and I didn't meditatively breath. My Dr wanted the cardiologist to do a 24 hour monitor but, to him, my heart was fine... There was no need. I would gladly do a 24 hour heart monitor. My heart feels like hell. The lack of sleep probably isn't helping. Sometimes, like now, the inside of my chest feels like it's burning. Like after a good workout. I also have an app on my phone that measures heart rate, I know it's not 100% reliable but, lately, it's been saying it's a little below 60. For someone who's fit and in shape, that's fine but, I'm so tired and feel awful, I haven't really exercised in a while. Pulse under 60 is considered Bradycardia. I have a heart murmur, supposed to an "innocent" murmur unless I have an underlying heart condition. It's 2 little leaks in my heart. Idk if that could be a problem.





 
 
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