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Forgive my ranting-ness. It's three in the morning and my last cup of coffee was more than four hours ago. My mood's as sour as the ******** grape juice. v.v;;

I'm only half a** willing to write this out, but maybe I'll feel better afterwards. Sexual tension blows. A lot. 'Specially when unrequited.

OH NOES! Fluffy has a crush again! To ******** with that. I'm just a wee bit to bitter for this to be happening. Just a wee bit. Tiny little wee bit. ******** that. I'm waaaaay too god damn bitter for this!

To tell the truth, I've had the crush for a while. Since like March. v.v;; It's gotten annoying. Cause even though I don't see the girl but hardly ever, when I do it's a pain in the a** cause I can hardly even be myself.

But alas, that's probably why I like her. She lives a ways a way so I don't have to run into her every day and as long as I keep a crush on her don't have worry about falling for someone else.

Those little transition periods suck. You know, like when you finally get over one person who doesn't want you and then you're flat on the floor over someone else. It's you finally climb all the way out of the pit just to fall into the next one. All this hormone s**t needs to die.

I yell at people for this very thing. Here I am doing it again. ******** hypocrite. Hell, I've blocked people for bitching at me about their problems. Can't they just choose something better? I admit, one can't choose to not fall, but one can get over it.

Just, I know the same detached bitter feeling comes with no matter who I fall for so what's the point? At least right now it's someone I don't have to deal with all the time. All I gotta do is force myself not to act on it at Ren Fair and I can stay happy with myself.

That's right, I'm the ******** opposite of any whiny person out there. I'm only happy when I'm not in a damn relationship. They bring out the clingy PoS worst in me. And I know that.

So I choose not to date people. Doesn't fill that little void thinger that turns people emo, but hell, I can live with that. I choose that over being annoying and clingy.

Why hell am I posting this? Simply because writing it out will make me feel better. That's right, dammit. That said, this is my journal so I post it here. I'm not gonna b***h at anyone over AIM or bring it up in a million topics. Just gonna leave it here. And probably post a random nonsense journal soon so this one isn't on top for ******** ever. Damn strait!