I don't ever go on gaia anymore but I need someplace to write my thoughts and i can't be stuffed starting a proper blog xD
This is to the girl, who's ever had her heart broken, to the girl, who's ever thought she wasn't good enough, to the girl who's ever been called ugly or fat or maybe this is just to myself.. who knows~
So here I am, I'm sitting at home, finding any possible distraction from finishing my economics, business and english assignments, all due next week of course.. xD As of tomorrow, it would have been exactly a week since [[Let's call him X..]] It would have been exactly a week since X and I started our "break". Though really, even though I call it a break I doubt we'll ever get back together.. He seems so much happier now, happier without me.. And i can't help but be jealous of him for it.. Why is it that he's able to move on so quickly... why is it that he's able to be so happy when I'm left here mourning the death of our relationship.. I know, I know, i sound quite pathetic right now... but i can't help but wonder when i'm alone at night... does he ever think of me? does he ever miss me like I miss him?
But alas, it doesn't matter, because he will never know... He will never know.. because everytime i see him i will smile.. and I'll continue smiling and feigning happiness.. Why? Because I'm stubborn I guess.. I'm stubborn enough to not want him to see this weak side of me... This side of me that misses him... I don't want him to see how much it's hurting and how much it kills me to see him so happy.. God this all sounds so pathetic... I'm going back to my economics assignment now.. Until next time~
This is to the girl, who's ever had her heart broken, to the girl, who's ever thought she wasn't good enough, to the girl who's ever been called ugly or fat or maybe this is just to myself.. who knows~
So here I am, I'm sitting at home, finding any possible distraction from finishing my economics, business and english assignments, all due next week of course.. xD As of tomorrow, it would have been exactly a week since [[Let's call him X..]] It would have been exactly a week since X and I started our "break". Though really, even though I call it a break I doubt we'll ever get back together.. He seems so much happier now, happier without me.. And i can't help but be jealous of him for it.. Why is it that he's able to move on so quickly... why is it that he's able to be so happy when I'm left here mourning the death of our relationship.. I know, I know, i sound quite pathetic right now... but i can't help but wonder when i'm alone at night... does he ever think of me? does he ever miss me like I miss him?
But alas, it doesn't matter, because he will never know... He will never know.. because everytime i see him i will smile.. and I'll continue smiling and feigning happiness.. Why? Because I'm stubborn I guess.. I'm stubborn enough to not want him to see this weak side of me... This side of me that misses him... I don't want him to see how much it's hurting and how much it kills me to see him so happy.. God this all sounds so pathetic... I'm going back to my economics assignment now.. Until next time~
xoxo Diana.
I guess you could say i miss you a little... A little too much, A little too often.
