Wow i just read my last journal thing and boy was i okay with everythiong, bit of a turn around now though - im totally not okay with everything thast going on in my life.
Im not doing great at school which is hard because some of my best mates n the peeps i sit next to in class are really smart and i just seem to be really not smart, which sucks because it makes me feel really dumb.
And im having major re-thinking about going to palmy university because its so far away and its gonna cost so much and i'll only have haley and rich is going to christchurch which is my second choice and i kinda wanna be down there with him now because i dont feel smart enough to go to palmy like im trying to achieve something that'll never work out so maybe it'd be easier to just go down to christchurch. Ya'll dont know bout my mum but yea shes in hospital at the moment and shes been in there for 2 and a half weeks- ive seen her once and because shes not at home i find myself trying to do everything so thats added stress. I ahvent been going to youth group on a friday night for a while because i know i wont enjoy myself yet i still go on tuesday nights because i feel safe at the hub (house where its held) and i feel like its okay to be sad there. Work sucks at the moment because im trying to find someone to cover a couple of my shifts so i can go to christchurch in the holidays but tim cant do my wednesday night and armand is already doing my saturday foir me plus he works ona wednesday anyways, grrr im so annoyed at time - he was one of my better mates right then he told me he kinda liked me right and i was like no you dont youve gota girlfriend and shes really nice and then i find out that hes been cheating on her anyways with this other chick bailey AND at the same time having a bit of a secret relationship with monique so im pissed off that he had the nerve to tell me he liked me with all of that happening.
i feel a bit better now, thanks
 cheeky_monkey_lol · Thu Jun 05, 2008 @ 05:47am · 0 Comments |
