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Later that day-March 25th 2009
It's only been and hour but I'm still worried about my poem. I didn't even realize I was writing those things until I finished writing. Is this poem the truth on my feelings inside me or is my mind playing games with me? I'm scared yet happy. In a way I get the feeling that if this keeps up I can become s totally new person then who I am now. Someone evil yet with emotion on the inside. I don't wanna be evil as I am saying but I get this feeling that if I become evil a tad, it will lead me to become good. Did that even make sense? I think my imagination or mind is flowing again. Iv'e also been having these dreams lately. Dreams about my friends, and myself. In my dreams I end up killing them just as a test to see how evil I am. I wake up confused every day now. Are these dreams warning me I might snap and lose control of myself, then do something stupid? Even so why?......
Today in school one of my friends (enemy) began crying because he was screamed at. Usually I would make fun of him for crying in school but when I saw his face all red with tears I gave pity for him. My heart sunk when I saw him like that. This wasn't normal behavior ethier. Somethings going on and Iv'e got to find out what it is soon before I start stupid things... twisted cry
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