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Bombay's Random Writings

Random randomness from the mind of a wierd little person. That would be me.

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\|Cry yourself to Sleep\| That's exactly what I did... sigh I'm so stupid sometimes... I don't know what's wrong with me. I can help people get along with thier friends, give them advice when they have problems, but for some reason, I'm the one who has the most problems with friends. It's like none of that 'good advice' is ever around when it comes to keeping my own friendships. I hurt someone very close to me without even realizing it. To the point where she didn't want to come online anymore because I'd just do it again. I didn't know I was doing anything like that. If I would have, I would have stopped myself. I never meant to hurt her, or anyone else. The harder I hold onto something, the further it slips until I have nothing... Maybe I should just stop holding on... I wasn't meant to have friends, it's part of my punishment for this world. Whatever I did in my other life to provoke this much have been so horrible. But I'm starting to think it doesn't matter if I get punished, I just keep doing more horrible things. Watch, my next life will be ten times worse... maybe I'll be some baby fresh out of the womb and either the sunlight or the air itself will kill me. Or I'll be some insignificant little bug, squished the moment someone sees me, but I won't know any better, and I'll just go into that death. I wish I could turn back time and fix this... I wish I knew what it was I kept saying to make people think I was talking down to them. I really don't mean to. I know I get selfish, and some of the things I think are completely opposite to those of what other's think. But I never stop to think when I should, and then think too much afterward. I just don't know what to do anymore... I'm such a horrible person, I should just die...

Posted by: dizziSquid Sun Nov 20, 2005 @ 02:00pm

boop

User Comments: [2]

Lord Kazumi
Community Member

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Tue Nov 22, 2005 @ 03:36am

I feel like that to sometimes. I mean I only have a few good friends and they do a lot of things with out me and it makes me feel so bad as if they don't want to be with me as if I am so boring that I shouldn't even be here. I try to tell them and when I do they act as if I am ok after I tell them how I feel. Right not I am just going to try and show them even more how I feel by not talking to them at all. Then they well run to me like how are you when I know they don't really care because if they did they would of try hard the frist time I told them how I felt.

Sorry for de random talking I just felt bad for you and me. And I don't really know you so this maybe weird to you. sorry and I know nothing that I said really had anything to do with what you said and I don't really know what you are talking abotu so sorry for my randomness. And I hope you don't really mean that you want to die I say that I want to die a lot to but I would never kill myself.

Sheamaru
Community Member

Offline

Wed Nov 23, 2005 @ 01:46am

Sin, I'm sorry. I don't exactly know what happened but whatever it is I can obviously tell it made you really upset. I'm so sorry I wasn't online for you to talk to or anything or was there when you needed someone. I feel so bad. But this isn't about me.

I don't know what to say to make you feel better exactly but please try not to be so down. You're a great person, everyone has their screw ups. And if your friend didn't tell you you were upsetting her then it's really her own fault. Unless she mentioned it you can't be to blame, it's not right for people to expect others to just be able to read their minds or understand what's wrong. I can tell this person is close to you and I hope that things sort out but I'm not entirely sure what else I could say.

Never doubt that you're a great person and people love you for that. Mistakes are part of the terriroty please try to not get so upset. Sometimes things just don't work out and it can hurt for a long time but you still have people that care about you. If things don't straighten out just remember that you have other friends that still love and care about you. I realize how cliche and stuff this all sounds and but it's true, it is, weather it seems that way or not. I can't promise that things will get fixed but I can hope for you and I always do.

I realize your upset and depressed but don't give up and don't think like that. Please, you're above that I know it. Just try to fix things, apologize or something, even if she won't get online or anything just keep trying. Keep in mind that I care about you and know you're going to be alright.

User Comments: [2]

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