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Story 2 (Chapters 1 and 2) |
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"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." - Barbara De Angelis
Chapter 1:
In the eyes of a child:
Beltane, 13
August 23, 1954
What of me? Do I feel no pain mother? Do these scars not hurt father? What of me? Am I to live a life worth living, or suffer a death worth suffering? I see the light of day, but it stings my eyes for I have chosen shelter in the darkness, right at the border of Lux Ateterna and Nox Ateterna. This is the name I have chosen for the two lands. I can see but a blur of what happens in Lux Aeterna, but it seems the children of the land are jovial. I cannot make out their features, but they seem to be beautiful. I could never compare with them, me, being a hideous disgusting creature, I was the sole cause of my parents suicide. I deserve to be alone, forever. They would never accept me, no matter how hard I attempted to earn their love, and even if they gave it to me, I would never be deserving of it.
Celeste, 12
August 23, 1954
What a beautiful morn we had today! The flowers were in bloom, the birds were singing, and the sun was shining! I visited mother's and father's graves today. I'm glad they were buried next to each other. Amidst the fights and the arguements, I knew they still loved each other. It wasn't their fault. I only ever saw them in my good graces. They were loving and always apologized for hitting me. They told me they loved me everyday. I truly felt loved, mother even baked me a cake and apologized after hitting me for overhearing a conversation of her trying to find me a foster home. It was my fault for eavesdropping like I did, but I didn't mind it much if I had to live with another family so long as my parents loved me, then I could go on. I lay white lilies by my mother's grave because she had always told me she loved them. I lay blue roses because father always looked best in blue.
Chapter 2:
Lovely Encounters:
Beltane, 14
December 2, 1955
I got shot in the leg today. Apparently I was on gang territory and they shot at me. I went to the hospital, but the paramedics said there wasn't much they could do because I was a wanderer of the streets and I had probably provoked the attack to begin with. They also mentioned how I looked like I couldn't afford to pay the bill, but luckily a man in blue opted to pay for it. That's all I remembered because I was suddenly bombarded with electric jolts of pain in my head. I clutched my head in agony and screamed out to make it stop. The paramedics rushed over and I heard one saying, "It's a head injury, and it looks mighty serious... He's bleeding... an... internal... stop... bleeding." then everything went black. What seemed like merely minutes of rest turned out to be hours and days (I found this out later) in which I remained in a coma. I awoke to the chirping of birds and the bright light from the only window in the room enveloping the sillouette of a fair-haired child no older than me. She was raising the blinds and opening the window when I asked her, "Where am I?" She seemed thoroughly startled and her back was rigid for a moment. She turned slowly and stared at me with eyes full of wonderment and surprise. She was a beauty. I immedietly assessed all of her immediate features: light brown shoulder length hair, enormous purple eyes almost like gems, soft, white skin, and a small frame, (one I imagined holding in my arms which made me blush and turn away from her). "Um, is something wrong? You're in the hospital right now. My name is Celeste, and I'm a volunteer here at Saint Avery's Children Hospital. I heard from the doctors that you got shot in the leg, and upon falling to the ground you suffered a head injury. Am I correct?" I looked up at her, face still red from the image and told her, "Um, I think so, but I didn't do anything to provoke them I swear!" She looked at me for a moment then walked over towards me with a look of comprehension and overwhelming kindness. I stared at her, oblivious to what her plans of action were. I took in more of her features as she walked over, never faltering or wavering with the warmth she seemed to be spreading from within her. She had a small mole right next to her mouth, and embellished no make-up. Her eyebrows were thin lines above her beautiful eyes. She had plump, naturally red lips. Looking very closely I noticed she had freckles, she was adorable. She was not model-beautiful, but she had an air about her that made me want to (yes, this crossed my mind) pull her in and k-k-kiss her. She stopped by me, then knealed down at my bedside grasped my hand, and began crying. I was shocked, but when she looked up I noticed her tears were glowing and she was smiling. She told me something I have been holding in my mind ever since, "I pray for you, and in all your suffering should you see the light." I was astonished, and nearly hugged her, but unfortunately she was called out of the room. She got up, then made to leave, but for some strange reason I refused to let her leave. I held firmly, well as firmly as I could in my state of weakness to her hand. She turned towards me tears still streaming freely down her face, smiled then kissed my forehead, "I'll only be gone a second. I won't leave you alone." At this I released her and watched as she walked out, in a state of calm, cool, and collected bliss. When I heard the door shut behind her, the realization of what just happened hit me, and my face heated up so much as my mind raced through the images of what just had happened. I became suddenly dizzy and passed out soon after.
Celeste, 13
December 2, 1955
I met a strange boy today. I was doing my volunteer work at the hospital, and I met a boy who seems older than me. He had been shot in the leg and had thus fallen and suffered a head injury as well. He seemed very poor, almost like me after my parents had died. I lived on the street for some time, too, but I found work at an old resturant. The owners knew me and offered me a job there several times before my parent's deaths. They were an elderly couple and saw me as a responsible young adult and thus wanted me to run their store when they passed away. I told them I would consider it, and being so young I told them they would be blessed with eternal youth. They looked at me for some time astonished, and I never could understand why. Then the elderly man smiled and simply said, "God has blessed us indeed," then ruffled my hair. When my parents died, it was a funeral in secret because if everyone heard about them shooting each other in a drunken arguement, it would shame our family. I wore all black to the occasion. I did not cry, but did stare at my mother's and father's lifeless bodies, and tried very much to listen to the heartbeats that were stilled forvever, and for a slight moment I heard it. Then I heard gasps all across the hall and turned to see what the commotion was about but they all seemed to be staring towards the caskets. I could no longer hear mother's or father's heartbeats. Then someone shouted, "We have an angel among us!" So I looked around hoping to see this angel, but their line of vision seemed to transfixed on the casket, so I turned toward it and looked at the wall behind it, too, scrutinizing every detail for a sign of where the angel might be or have been, but I saw nothing of the sort. I abandoned my search and stared at my parents once more. I did not attempt to listen to their heartbeats, but instead I sang a soft ballad. I had written the song in an attempt to disperse my mother's woes when her mother had died. She seemed to love it, but asked me to stop singing and never sing again. I sang the song, and I began hearing chirping and scratching at the fire exit. A staff member of the funeral home opened the door and several animals ran in, the staff member nearly avoiding being trampled, and surrounded me. Then, another cry sprang out, "How can she be an angel when she nearly killed someone with her singing?!" Everyone was in uproar after that. Most of them on what seemed to be the angel's side. Then, someone, in the midst of the arguement, swung his arms out in rage, and whacked a nearby horse in the eye. It reared onto it's hind legs and made a loud battle cry of sorts. Everyone backed away and the horse continued on in it's rage. An unsuspecting child wandered towards the horse out of curiosity, but none of the people, who were too afraid for themselves, took care to notice until it was too late. The horse slammed back down onto the ground and hit the child square on in the chest. He was kiilled immedietly, and I felt a sort of pull towards the body. I walked over swiftly and began singing another serenade. I saw a little white ball rush out of the body. It was giggling and seemed happy. I told the ball in a voice not completely my own, "I shall see to it that you are safe." Then a light came from the ceiling and the ball was taken with it, and through the roof. Everyone in the room stared at me in bewilderment. Heck, I wanted to stare at myself in bewilderment. I had no idea what had just happened. A sudden uproar rose swiftly when a man shouted, "Satan's child!" and everyone scrambled out of the room stepping on whoever, and killing many of the children, all of the elderly, and injuring some of the remaining. I stared in disbelief, then realized I had been indirectly cast out of the family. I walked to what used to be home to gather what I might need to survive the cold winter night I knew I was going to have to endure alone. Never did the news get a hold of the information of the several deaths on that day. Everything remained in secret, so I went to the elderly friends of mine and asked for a job. Immedietely they gave me a job, and I began work there everyday. The pay was good and it allowed me to survive. I told them that "we" could not afford to pay for water, so they let me shower at their house. They constantly bought me nice outfits, and spoiled me. They let me eat meals with them, then offered me to take leftovers home. I did, but home had become something far from what they might have thought it was. I lived in an abandoned alley. I shared my "take-out" as my new-found friends called it, with the local homeless people. They were very grateful, and always watched to make sure I came and left both work and home safely. I saved up my money and finally started making payments on a house. It was a rather big house, and luckily for me around that time buisness really picked up in the old resturant and my pay check expanded significantly. I finished paying off the house last year, but the elderly people have been long gone for over two years now. They died in a drive-by. I was not deeply greived, though I did love them. I saved up to get them a nice funeral, and kissed each on the forehead and said my good byes. Well, enough about that, the boy I met today, he was rather shy. He had long dark brown hair tied up that reached all the way to his waist. His eyes were a beautiful shade of chocolate brown that made me want to lean down and kiss him. He had a huge frame (well, not huge but an average boy frame, maybe a bit larger). His clothes were ragedy, and torn. He radiated of undeserved pain and suffering. I acted rather oddly and held his hand and cried. Then I even kissed him on the forehead as I walked out! (I was so embarassed afterwards!) Then I finished my hours, rushed to the buisness, served up a few costumers (buisness was slow), and walked to where the homeless friends of mine were. Everyday, rain or shine, I stopped by to make sure they had blankets and food. If the weather was too cold I'd make them come home with me, but they insisted on staying outside instead of being a burden to me. I walked back home after that, and fell onto my bed and was fast asleep afterwards, my mind racing with dreams and secret fantasies of the boy.
 SereofChaos · Sat Feb 12, 2011 @ 03:52am · 0 Comments |
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