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"Thats right, i cried, on friday, i decided to call Kristina, i had felt depressed all day, and like i said a while back, it was her birthday, and one year ago, i was gonna call her and say happy b-day, but i was scared, of what she might say, i was a coward, and spent one full year, regretting what i did not do. she was so happy to hear from me, she was in tears, and im going to go to her place for the first time in 2 years and say hi. after we said goodbye, i droped my phone, i was so happy, nothing could make the day better, but i could no longer hold in in the pain of the last few years, one of the girls that i mentioned was with me, i was at her place, i lunged on to her crying, for the first time in a long time, another human being felt my tears, of happiness and sadness. i was crying. she was there for me, and she held on to me, i was so happy, to have a friend like her, so i have made my decision, from that last entry, she is my decision, but i don't really know what to do next. so many doors have opened, and yet so many are still closed, which ones will i open? and which ones will i close?"