Life

• Artist: DynnoJ Melloe
• Description: Last 2 lines - Inspired by Linkin Park
• Date: 12/03/2008
• Tags: life

Within lands where hope once lingered
souls lie trapped
Cold inside the corpses of doleful bodies

Mists of happiness
once roamed the face of earth
Replaced by stress, loss and sorrow

Children born with gift of joy,
bringing smiles to those who bred them
Will lose hope and fall,
into hands of the broken spirited

Why must death be feared
when it brings salvation?

Then, there are those who stand strong
eyes determined, but for what purpose?
what goal?

We smile, we fight the weary world
only to bring laughter and life
into those downhearted

Futility to those who live it,
bliss to those whom leave it
Choice is over-rated,
And all will fall in woe

Even those who never frown
will eventually break down

Comments

[Vampire_of_Dark_Daughters]

i luv it

[Ente Lotus]

lol uber mr.john a thon (noidea hu he is) the ansa is always 5!!

[Akirekira]

verry nice, the sorrow of death and the laughter and joy of life, I like the theam of two sides of a storie^-^ verry nice, 5/5

[DynnoJ Melloe]

razz dude just because it says comment doesnt mean it wants you to go Mr. John on me razz hahaha (or are you practicing for the in class commentary tmrow?)

[Fagatron Gobblecoque]

(comment continued part 3) Thought sometimes words seem out of place. For example; "only to bring laughter and life," the 'only' should have a comma for the intonation.

[Fagatron Gobblecoque]

(comment continued) It reflects my belief that the suffering in this world is not created by evil people, but by those whose 'spirits are broken.' People who have given up on happiness are doomed to drag others with them.

Your poems have a very good flow, the simple yet clear diction makes them read naturally and easier to relate to;

[Fagatron Gobblecoque]

Last 2 lines lifted directly from Linkin Park you mean razz

I like the lines; "Children born with the gift of joy /.../ will lose hope and fall into the hands of the broken spirited."