The Ending Hour

• Artist: Alibis of the Heart
• Description: I wrote this poem a couple years back, and I liked it, so I thought I'd post it here^^
• Date: 01/03/2009
• Tags: ending hour

Pick your poison
Red or wine
pour me some in do good time
Kill me fast or Kill me slow
Promise me you'll never let me go
Take my life instead of my hand
Let my life slip away like sand
Call my name never more
strike me now and settle the score
Let me die of painful sorrow
I will never get to see tomorrow
Drop the daggar from your blood covered hands
Now join the ritual of the Celtic Clans
The air chokes while the thunder roars
I won't see the stars no more
I want you to kill me the one I adore
I was strangeled on my bed
and now I lie here dead
With closed fingers and shut eyes
And one rose in hand, both yours and mine.

Comments

[iluvpolkadots]

Good. Just work on punctuation...and try to make a wee bit smoother? Excellent job!

[Agrikar the Hidden]

I like the idea and story behind it, especially since its about the Celts razz . However, Line 4 could do without 'me' on both occations, Line 6 could do without 'away', stuff like that, just to keep the measure.

[UC Poika]

Good poem. But it seems a bit trite in places nor something--forgive me. I don't know what.

[duir ancient]

This sounds pretty arcane, you know. I like it. I wrote something comparable to this once upon a time, but I lost it... if I find it, I'll send it to you.

[James191]

Wow, Thats really good, you have talent.

[iEpicPieCrust]

omg thats really good i like it a lot its very well put and makes me think....well just to let u kno this is momichi17 since mi old account got blocked i had to comment u with this 1 well i give u a 4/5 or 5/5 not sure yet well good luck on ur rates

[Pondy Is The Coolest]

This is really great! *hugs* You're an Incredible poet, Sandy ^^ Who's your love? o.O lol. IS THERE SOMEONE YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME ABOUT?!?!?