Life is a Hell

• Artist: AliceCullen1030
• Description: I wrote this one day in my room sitting in the dark. I don't know. I guess it is kind of depressing, but it is something that just popped into my head. Please tell me exactly what you think.
• Date: 01/26/2009
• Tags: life hell

This life is a hell.
Each Breath is a waste.
Each cut was the flower, filling my vase.

Comments

[scitama]

More detail, and you could really come up with something big. I think you could wink

[iGarth]

I assume this is a haiku so I don't agree with Cast Stick. A 5-5-9 one I think, if you change flow-er to flo'er. I really like it though. 4/5.

[MeIanite]

If you expand it, and add more it would be a lot better. and I think you should go more into detail about why you think your life is such a hell hole, because you might find out that what you percieve as hell isn't no where near what others are experiencing in their everyday lives. 3/5