• My breath comes more labored now,
    I can't see straight,
    the tears just keep coming.
    My body doesn't look the way,
    that it's supposed to.

    There are so many other people out there.
    That desearve the looks that you get,
    but you rampage through life,
    thinking that your the greatest.

    It was supposed to be my party,
    Why was everyone there for you?
    I planned it by myself.
    I bought all the stuff for myself.
    Why was every one looking at you.

    Maybe if I hide away for a long time,
    everyone would forget that I exsited in the first place.
    Maybe I wasn't even supposed to be born
    I was a mistake.
    That's why my mother didn't want me,
    maybe that's why my father died.

    I am a curse that was born upon this world.
    Don't tell me I have a great personality,
    That hurts when you lie.

    You all act like you care,
    but god I know what your really thinking.
    I'm still up for the hiding.

    Today,
    I made the guest list,
    of all my friends.
    It came to about six.

    People who actually showed up would probably amount to,
    four of the six.

    there is a fire in the middle of the yard.
    I can see myself burninig in it.
    I can see my flesh turn black,
    my eyes crying their last tears.

    Breaking one's hopes of everything,
    I think that the smart thing would be too,
    sit in my room and write my feelings out in this
    online jornal,
    that's where every one knows me anyway.