• To hold you.
    To keep you.
    To love you.
    had been my only goal.
    To have you forever in my arms
    was my only wish.
    So i held you, tighter than anyone had ever held you before.
    I kept you, safe from harm and shielded from pain.
    I loved you more than i loved anyone else, more than myself.
    And yet, your only wish was to leave.
    When you released me, and let me fall. I stood and held on even tighter
    When you left me, abandoned and alone in the cold. I endured and somehow found my way back to you.
    When you told me, that you hated me. I took it as a lie, told you I loved you. Showed you loved, you never once saw me cry.
    And even after all of that,
    After all the hate and disappointment
    the pain and despair, I was still naive.
    I couldn't see
    clearly, I couldn't see. Or i would have seen.
    From the very first moment, i had fooled my self.
    I tried to fool my heart into thinking that you loved me
    into knowing that i loved you
    when the truth was
    i didn't.
    my deepest
    my darkest
    my true desire was simple
    i wanted you gone from me, away from me. Somewhere that would keep my heart from getting hurt.
    and yet i hurt it anyway
    looking for something that didn't make since
    in a place that never existed.