Dreaming of a Hero

• Artist: Karen The Llama
• Description: This is a poem I wrote while in the hospital waiting room. I was inspired because my mom was in the ICU and It's just really hard to take in so I thought I should try writing it out. (BTW, I've already posted this on my website and now out of a whim I've decided to post it here.)
• Date: 04/15/2011
• Tags: dreaming hero

I feel so hollow

Not exactly knowing what to think

I watch as she lies there

Restlessly as she tosses and turns

I desperately want to help her

Relieve her pain and suffering

But I can’t

I’m much too mortal and ordinary

I know it’s too much to ask

But tonight I dream of a hero

That will give me the strength

And will to stand by her side

Until once again she becomes herself

Comments

[Idiosyncratic Quirk]

I know how it is to watch your own mom in the hospital, helpless. >.< The juggernaut falls and the world feels unjust - and the only real hero is time and perseverance.
I liked this, but on a literary level, you could have made your hollowness and helplessness more poetic with metaphors and whatnot. :/
3/5 Keep writing