There's a lot of internal struggle right now. I know I haven't done the smartest things in the past, and I wasn't going to do the smartest thing less than twelve hours ago. The only reason I didn't go through with it is from the shame and guilt my mom put on me.
Is there something wrong and shameful in wanting to do something special for a guy? Why do I continue to beat myself up over never being able to please anyone in my life? Or better yet, why am I never able to please anyone? Not myself. Not my parents. Not the guy I like. Not my friends.
It just seems futile to try and please anyone right now.
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Stand On Mountains
Virtue alone is nobility.
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