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Sakura-chan... it sounds like you have an awful lot on your plate right now... :( Just try and hang in there okay? Just do the best you can do without burning yourself out and I'm sure that all the hell will clear up eventually! We only have one more week before spring break!!! :heart: Don't give up!! If you truly want to, you [i]can[/i] get out of that spiral. Not everything in life comes easy Sakura, thats why certain things are so precious, even if they are as simple as happiness, a deep thought, or that brief "I love you." Just remember that if you ever feel lost or overwhelmed, each and everyone of us cares for you and will be more than happy to split that burden with you. Because even if we may tire from the load we take on, its still better than bearing nothing at all and watching you collapse. And I know that you're going through a lot of pain due to volleyball, as you explained everything in that little PM conversation. Thats very sweet and considerate of you to show nothing but kindness to the end, even if your team mates did seem to push you aside. That's very noble Sakura-chan. But even if you did find the chance to give them your final wishes, I'm not sure if it would've done much good from the impression I'm making according to what you told me about them. I think just the fact that you thought of them to the end is enough. If you did your best to be kind to them while you were at their side, I'm sure that's good enough. They obviously still have much to learn about life and people and feelings and I think we should just leave it to them when they will be ready to accept what life really holds for them. Only they can decide that, and we can't make their decisions for them. Maybe say a prayer for them... I don't know how religious you are or how you choose to hold God, but from what I believe, I think just caring can be more than enough. I'll say a prayer for them too, because that might be all that we can do... and even the simplest action is better than nothing and can be enough to change the world.