• Naruto, Sasuke, and Jr. had been sitting under a tree for five minutes and had already started fighting.
    Jr.: Daddy, Mommy is cheating!
    Naruto: No I’m not!
    Jr.: Yes you are!
    Sasuke: Naruto, stop fighting with Jr.
    Naruto: …
    Jr.: Stop being a butt!
    Owww, if I showed him my true form, he would respect me, Naruto thought in annoyance, but he has never seen me as a guy though. Ever since the day Jr. came, Naruto had used the sexy jutsu. He only let go when Sasuke and him were alone.
    Jr.: Mom, why are you so dumb?
    Naruto: Dumb?!
    Sasuke: You two settle down!
    Jr.: But dad…
    Sasuke: I said settle down!
    Naruto and Jr. both started crying at the same time. Sasuke sighed and looked down.
    Sasuke: Let’s go inside.
    So everybody went inside Naruto and Sasuke’s cozy house. They ate dinner and after a food fight between Naruto and Jr., everyone went to their bedrooms. Since Naruto and Sasuke shared a room alone, Naruto became a boy again.
    Sasuke: Much better.
    Naruto blushed. Then they kissed.
    Naruto: I love you Sasuke. Oh Sasuke!
    Sasuke: Oh yes.
    Naruto: Harder!
    Sasuke: Aii!
    Naruto: We should do this more often.
    Sasuke: Yes we should.
    Then Jr. walked in.
    Jr.: Oh my God! My eyes! Oh my God! Mom, you’re a man!
    Naruto: It’s not what it looks like.
    Sasuke: Yes it is, now go away.
    Jr. went away.
    Naruto: Oh my God, I have a p***s!
    Sasuke: No dip!
    Naruto: Oh yeah, lets have smex biggrin .
    Sasuke: Okay!
    3 hours later-
    Naruto: Zzzz.
    Sasuke: Wtf man, he fell asleep!
    Naruto: I’m awake. Zzzz… chicken…
    Sasuke: … Wtf.
    The next morning-
    Naruto: Zzz… Ramen…
    Sasuke: Speaking of ramen… BREAKFAST!
    Sasuke ran into the kitchen and quickly made food.
    Later on that morning, Naruto woke up-
    As he entered the kitchen, Sasuke had a surprised look on his face.
    Sasuke: You’re not using the sexy jutsu?
    Naruto: No, since Jr. saw last night, there’s no longer a reason to hide.
    Sasuke: I love you.
    Naruto: I love you too.
    Then they started hugging.
    Jr. then walked in and started staring at them.
    Jr.: … My life is a lieeeeeeee!
    Jr. ran out of the room screaming.
    Sasuke: I think it’s time for ‘the talk’.
    Naruto: ‘The talk‘?
    Sasuke: Yes, ‘the talk’.
    Naruto: He’s only five!
    Sasuke: … So?… Jr., come here. It’s time for us to give you ’the talk’.
    Jr.: Whaaaat?
    Naruto: When two guys love each other, they have sodomy and then they get married.
    Sasuke: We know cause that’s what we did.
    Naruto: Then you came…
    Jr.: Daddy?
    Sasuke: Naruto, What’s sodomy?
    Naruto: You know what sodomy is! It’s what we do in bed at night…
    Sasuke: … Sleeeep?
    Naruto: No, have butt smex!
    Sasuke: We don’t have butt smex!
    Naruto: Yes we do, cause we’re gay!! And that’s what gay people do!
    Sasuke: Oh yeah…
    Jr.: Daddy, what is sex and what is gay?
    Naruto: Uhhhh…. You’ll learn when you’re nine from your friends.
    Jr.: Like Kakashi-Sensei?
    Naruto: Yes, from a pervert like Kakashi.
    Jr.: Daddy, what’s a pervert?
    Sasuke: Naruto… [Sasuke looks like he’s going to punch Naruto in the mouth.]
    Naruto: Nothing, Jr.
    Later On-
    Jr.: Does this mean I have two daddies?
    Sasuke: No, you still have to call Naruto mommy, okay?
    Jr.: Oh… okay. Mommy, I love you even if you are a man.
    Naruto: I love you too, Jr.
    Jr.: Can I have sodomy?
    Sasuke: Um.. Uh… no…
    Jr.: Aw, why not?
    Sasuke: Sodomy is for… married people.
    Jr.: Awww… Mommy will you marry me?
    Naruto: Yes, I will when you turn nine and get taller.
    Jr.: Yahhhh! We could have sodomy!
    Naruto started blushing.
    Sasuke: I live with so many fags…
    Naruto: Hey, that’s not nice!
    Jr.: Hey, what’s a f**?
    Naruto: Well, in England, it’s a cigarette!
    Jr.: Oh… what’s a cigarette?
    Then the house exploded.
    Luckily, Naruto and Sasuke got out alive. Too bad for Jr. though.
    Sasuke: Jr.!!!! Juuuuunnnniiiiiioooorrrrr! Nooooo!
    Naruto: He was a good ninja.
    Sasuke: You dumb***, he wasn’t even in the ninja academy yet.
    Naruto: Well… I’ll still miss him.
    Then Sasuke came over to Naruto and held him while he cried.
    Naruto: Oh Sasuke…
    Sasuke: It’s okay… Aww… It’ll be alright… It’s alright… It’s okay…
    Naruto: Our kid! [He goes back to crying.]
    Sasuke: It’s okay… He’s with Hoe-Kag-Gay now.
    Naruto: It’s hokage.
    Sasuke: Naruto…
    Just then Sakura ran up to them.
    Sakura: Oh em gee! Sahs-kay! I love you! I want to bear your children! Why don’t you like me? Why can’t we b-
    Then she got shot.
    Then Sasuka and Naruto just looked at her.
    Naruto: Hey, let’s put a dead opossum in her mouth!
    Sasuke: But she’s still breathing.
    Naruto: Oh… Can we burn off all her hair?
    Sasuke: Okay.
    “Get away from me!”
    Iruka: Kakashi come back! I’ve gotten over my fan-based obsession with you! I really love Hokage! Even if he is dead!
    Kakashi: So? You sick freak! You tried to rape me!
    Iruka: Only once!
    Kakashi: I don’t love you! I love Chi! She bore my child!
    Iruka: What?! Is that a fan-based character?
    Kakashi: Yes, but I love her! She lets me squish her boobs!
    Iruka: Can I squish your boobs?
    Kakashi: No!
    Then he runs away.
    Back to Naruto and Sasuke-
    Naruto: Look! Fireworks!
    Sasuke: Shut up you idiot!
    Naruto: What do you want to do now?
    Sasuke: Ice cream?
    Naruto: Okay!
    At Ninja Queen-
    Naruto: I love ramen ice cream!
    Sasuke: You are disgusting.
    Naruto: Well, it beats your p***s flavored ice cream.
    Sasuke: What can I say? I likey the p***s!
    Naruto: Wtf?
    Then Kakashi comes up to them.
    Kakashi: What are you guys talking about?
    Naruto and Sasuke together: p***s.
    Kakashi: Ewww… I like boobs. I love Chi’s boobs. Boooobieeess! Boooooooooobieeesssss!!!!
    Naruto: I have boobs sometimes…
    Sasuke: Yes, but they’re mine to touch.
    Naruto: Nuh-uh! They’re mine. And I can let Kakashi touch them if I want.
    Kakashi: I think I’ll pass… That’s nice and all but… I don’t roll that way.
    Naruto: But you’re always reading that perverted book.
    Sasuke: What book?
    Kakashi: This one, and it’s not perverted. It’s just an adult novel.
    Naruto: With naked girls and condoms.
    Sasuke: Let me see! [Snatches Kakashi’s book and starts reading it.]
    Sasuke: Oh my gosh! My eyes! They burn! Save me, I’m turning straight!
    Naruto: Don’t worry, I’ll save you! [Naruto jumps on Sasuke and rapes him.]
    Kakashi: Um… Okay… I think I’ll leave now…
    Then Kakashi runs away.
    Naruto: Wait… Come back! We need you for a three-way!
    So eventually Lizzie got tired of this story and threw the papers at Delece.
    Then Delece said “No! Then Naruto and Sasuke had a three-way! Then end!”