• I looked down into the depths as death and darkness took me.
    I had never wanted this!
    I had just wanted a way to escape from the pain.
    I see my mom scream as she saw me.
    She sees her baby lying in a pool of blood.
    Her baby’s hand slowly raises up to her.
    Then it drops down, splashing in the pool of blood as it dropped.
    She listens as I, her baby, whisper in a horse voice “Help. Sorry.”
    She runs away and I can hear her calling 911.
    Everything is growing darker.
    Why did I cut that deep?
    Why?
    I only wanted to escape.
    To escape from all the tortures in this world.
    I thin about my friends.
    How will they react?
    What will they do?
    What have I done?
    As I lay there I can hear the faint wail of the sirens in the distance.
    Suddenly everything goes black.
    Just as suddenly, everything has an overabundance at light.
    I can see everything from above.
    There I am.
    Lying so still in the rich crimson puddle I had created with my blood.
    Medical people burst in to the room.
    They take one look at my body and reach for a sheet.
    All the while my mom screams and cries in agony.
    My dad runs in and sees the sheet being draped over his little princess.
    He remembers the more entire “one time daddy!” and “one more book daddy!”
    He knew there would be no more fighting about the car or homework.
    No more fighting about “family time.”
    There would be no more family time.
    Never again.
    I watched my dad go over and comfort my hysterical mom.
    As he walks over to her, I can see a single tear run down his cheek.
    The medical people put my bloody body on a gurney and wheel me out of the room.
    As my body passes, my mom sinks to her knees and takes my bloody hand in hers.
    She kisses the huge bleeding gash in my wrist so tenderly.
    Dad kneels beside her and whispers something in her ear.
    She drops her head on his shoulder and weeps harder.
    They watch as I am wheeled out of their lives forever.
    What had I done to them?
    What had I done to my family?
    My friends?
    Myself?
    I had only wanted to escape.
    My escape had turned into something else.
    Something horrid.
    But I didn’t mean to!
    I had only wanted to escape.
    Escape.