• I was walking around my house wondering ''why did it feel so wrong to be here?'' it was because i didnt belong anymore. my mother had left, my father was dead, my brother is living his own life, and my sister was gone. she was married and had twins. but what about me? i was standing here in my old house. my old, abandoned, dark house. i grew up in this house. as a little kid. now? now i was 22. i was grown up. but why? wy did i feel so alone and dead. all these memories coming back. the sad ones, happy ones, depressing ones, mad ones, and.....my personal ones........the lonely ones. of when the first time my heart was broken. the corner i had sat in to cry my self to sleep that was still hiding in the shadows. the place i hid from my family, my friends, and myself. everyone. the blood stained carpet of when i cut myself. my wrist's, my legs, and....my throat. none had killed me nor sent me to the hospital. i sat in that spot once yet again as i always had. my carvings in the walls. my little friends i used to call out to them as. it was an empty house. very cold, very lonely, very quiet, very empty, very.....dead.....i touched the burned walls. the burn marks of when i tried to burn myself from the pain of a cold, black, empty heart. all these memories, all these sad things made me cry yet again. made me empty yet again. and once again, i saw him. the one that haunted me as a kid.....jasel....(<-- jay-zel). the ghost that talked to me. the ghost that asked so many questions. the ghost that saved my life. the curious jasel. the one that wandered through my thoughts picking every bad one to ask about. "Hello jasel" i said to the empty air. he wasnt there. i was wandering in my own memories and saw him the way i left him when i disappeared for a few weeks. his tears, his saddness, his pain was now mine. i left the house yet once again. "Goodbye" i wishpered into the air and blew away in the wind. back to heavan.