• I sat on the sofa, staring at the floor. I couldn’t believe it.

    Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
    Somewhere along in the bitterness

    They were really all gone. Forever. And it had been ten years since I had seen any of their faces. I hated being blind. All I can pull out of that night were the screams and wails and gunshots. And not to mention the sound of blood splattering. I couldn’t get them out of my head. I remember feeling Fang’s wounds, trying to figure out if they could be healed. Poor Nudge. She was so young to die, only 21. And Gazzy and Angel. Gazzy was just barely 18. And Max….oh, Max, you knew better than to throw yourself into that fray.

    And I would have stayed up with you all night
    Had I known how to save a life

    There was no one left for me. I was the last one of the flock, the only one living. I felt like killing myself. Then maybe I could see them all again.
    Nudge, dark skinned and talkative.
    Gazzy, my partner in crime.
    Angel, the sweetest one in the group.
    Fang, tall and silent.
    Max, our strong, dependable leader.
    Not so dependable now, are you, Max?

    Let him know that you know best
    ‘Cause after all you do know best

    Even Total was gone. Married that stupid dog Akila and left. And Dr. Martinez and Ella went back to Arizona. Even Ari would have helped ease the pain a tiny bit. But his expiration date had come six years ago.

    Try to slip past his defense
    Without granting innocence
    Lay down a list of what is wrong

    I couldn’t go back to my parents, not ever. They would just try to turn me into a freak show again. And I would never grant the whitecoats the satisfaction of having me in their clutches once more. The whitecoats. I hated their guts; it was their fault I was blind, their fault the flock was dead. Their fault that little seven year old Ari was dead. Everything that had happened to us was their fault.

    The things you’ve told him all along
    And pray to God he hears you
    And pray to God he hears you

    I wanted to throw something, but I was too weak with grief. I wanted to curse, but that would do me no good. I wanted to cry, but I had run out of tears. If only Max were here; she would cheer me up. Or even Fang would make me happy, just to hear his voice again. Anyone’s voice. The silence was driving me insane.

    As he begins to raise his voice
    You lower yours and grant him one last choice
    Drive until you lose the road
    Or break with the ones you’ve followed

    The weirdest thing was, I couldn’t remember a thing about the past two days after the flock died. Nothing at all. No matter how hard I tried.

    He will do one of two things
    He will admit to everything
    Or say he’s just not the same

    I spread my wings, shook them a little and let the feathers align. Then I went over to the door and threw it open. A gust of cold wind hit me and I shivered. But I ran outside and took off anyway, following the sound of trickling water. After a while, I touched down and felt the snow collapse under my feet. I was freezing, and the wind was howling. I sat down in the snow and wrapped my wings around myself for warmth. I missed them all so much.

    Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
    Somewhere along in the bitterness
    If only I’d had more time to help them.
    And I would have stayed up with you all night
    Had I known how to save a life

    I laid back. Snowflakes hit my face and melted, mingling with my tears. I guess I fell asleep, because the snow had stopped long ago, and I no longer felt the warmth of the sun. I sat up, wishing I could see. Suddenly, I heard a voice.
    “Iggy! Iggy! What are you doing out here?”
    Was that…
    “You idiot, you could have frozen to death!”
    It couldn’t be.
    “C’mon, let’s get you home.” Someone grabbed me by the arm and hauled me to my feet.
    “Wait! You guys are all dead!” I said, sure that I was finally crazy.
    ‘What the heck are you talking about?” It was Max. “Why would we be dead?”

    Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
    Somewhere along in the bitterness
    And I would have stayed up with you all night
    Had I known how to save a life

    ”We’ve been looking all over for you, man!” Gazzy.
    “What made you think you could sleep out here, Ig?” That was Fang.
    “I-I….had a dream that you all died….it was so realistic.” I felt Max’s wings wrap around me, and I felt warm.
    ‘Don’t worry. We aren’t going anywhere.” She hugged me, and I felt her smile. More wings wrapped around me; Angel and Nudge. Then Gazzy, and finally, Fang. It was a big circle of warmth and happiness, and I felt so peaceful.
    How to save a life
    “Let’s go home,” I said, and I heard five pairs of wings spread, ready for flight. I spread my own, and we took off, heading for home.
    Home.
    Where we belonged.

    How to save a life