Mood: _______
Song: I'm the Kind to Take It Personal; Breathe Carolina
So today is best friends day.
Funny how I lost mine.
Ha ha..
I've lost a lot of friends now that I look at it.
Friends I don't need.
I need to remove some people.
Well. I'm going to dedicate this journal to you, Connor.
Like the stalker freak I am.
Okay where to start...;w ;
I stole that face from you
well.
It was
; ~ ;
Then it evolved into ; w ;
Ugh people keep asking me
"You still consider him your bff?"
******** yes I do.
I told him everything.
He knew everything.
Its so sad we broke apart so easy.
Maybe he-- No no.
This isn't time for this.
Doop.
Our best inside joke ever.
Nurse Paigey Pie and Dr. Connie Cakes.
Ha ha.
All those comics.
The tradition of a cake on your birthday.
Hrm.
I wonder if you'll let me back into your life by then...
Purple was your favorite color.
You silly boy.
Just one. Ha ha that was a good joke.
And the whole thing with Joe.
I remember we watched Spongebob together.
It still reminds me of you. hur hur.
And we watched a little of Mythbusters.
All those long phone convos.
You were really the only one I was comfy with on the phone.
A long silence would go by and I didn't even feel awkward.
Ha ha.
You've fallen asleep on the phone before.
It was cute.
I COULD HEAR YOU BREATHING D:<
.../creepy.
Oh god.
Ha ha...I never realized how strong my feelings for you were...
Oh my god. Jesus.
Lol.
It just all hit me.
All the memories. Jesus ******** christ.
I miss you so much.
The time you opened up to me about Michelle.
And when you said you only smoked cigz when you were really stressed.
The time you called me drunk.
...
The time you called me high. Ha ha...
The times you defended me against Zeo.
The time I got super pissed at Michelle because she hurt you so bad.
All our disney texts. Hur hur.
All the time I spent with you instead of Drew.
Your silly purple font.
Your silly profile that never changes.
Your silly picture.
Your brown skin talk2hand
Your silly obsession with hair ha ha. xDD
Your giggles and laughs.
Your voice.
Paigey Popsicle.
Hurrr.
Connur. Connie Nommie.
...Hurr..
All the laughs we shared.
All the stupid conversations we had.
The one person I trusted most.
The one person who I've let make me so upset most...
You still make my belly do flips and turns.
You still make my heart beat fast in anticipation.
For that conversation that's never going to happen...
You were a puzzle to me Connor.
You still are.
Maybe that's where I went wrong.
I over analyzed you.
I tried too hard to figure you out...
I don't know...
Atreyu makes me think of you singing Blow to me over the phone.
This Love, This Hate makes me think of us as we were.
Black Dahlia makes me think of our fights.
All Again for You makes me think of how I feel for you.
Only One makes me think of us.
The Way She Moves oddly makes me think of you ha ha.
Duality...Yeah.
And others...
Haha.
I remember when we nerded out for Pokemon.
Ha, You and your Crobat.
I'd tell you stuff that people were doing that bothered me.
Huuur. you probably have so much s**t on me its not even funny.
Secretly I liked giving you pictures.
I liked your compliments.
I'd just be like "Naaah" Cuz I didnt wanna seem conceited.
I wish I could have been more open with you.
I was starting too...And then it got crushed.
I never realized I felt so much for you..
Its scary...
Really scary...
Is this why you pushed it out..?
I can see why...
I can barely think straight..
I find no comfort in people's hollow words.
I miss you - my best friend till eternity.
I hope you read this and remember the good times.
Nah, you don't have to talk to me.
Nah, I'm not trying to prove anything with this entry.
But I'd love for you to text me.
To IM me.
To anything.
Its funny how we've all changed.
That text I sent you about hating you.
I know I can't.
I just told you that to make you happy.
You wanted me to hate you.
Or so you said.
So I did as you pleased, my little fickle Master.
Ha ha ha.
And I meant everything I said.
I wanted to let all that frustration out.
Might have not been in the best way, but it felt great.
I'm sorry if I was bitchy.
I didn't mean to be.
Being blunt is being a b***h for me, so...
You won't see this anyway so why do my confessions matter?
Who knows.
Just getting it all out I assume.
Anyway.
That is my little spill about my BFFJILL Connor.
Who I miss but won't try to reclaim because I am scared of his rejection.
Like a boss.
Song: I'm the Kind to Take It Personal; Breathe Carolina
So today is best friends day.
Funny how I lost mine.
Ha ha..
I've lost a lot of friends now that I look at it.
Friends I don't need.
I need to remove some people.
Well. I'm going to dedicate this journal to you, Connor.
Like the stalker freak I am.
Okay where to start...;w ;
I stole that face from you
well.
It was
; ~ ;
Then it evolved into ; w ;
Ugh people keep asking me
"You still consider him your bff?"
******** yes I do.
I told him everything.
He knew everything.
Its so sad we broke apart so easy.
Maybe he-- No no.
This isn't time for this.
Doop.
Our best inside joke ever.
Nurse Paigey Pie and Dr. Connie Cakes.
Ha ha.
All those comics.
The tradition of a cake on your birthday.
Hrm.
I wonder if you'll let me back into your life by then...
Purple was your favorite color.
You silly boy.
Just one. Ha ha that was a good joke.
And the whole thing with Joe.
I remember we watched Spongebob together.
It still reminds me of you. hur hur.
And we watched a little of Mythbusters.
All those long phone convos.
You were really the only one I was comfy with on the phone.
A long silence would go by and I didn't even feel awkward.
Ha ha.
You've fallen asleep on the phone before.
It was cute.
I COULD HEAR YOU BREATHING D:<
.../creepy.
Oh god.
Ha ha...I never realized how strong my feelings for you were...
Oh my god. Jesus.
Lol.
It just all hit me.
All the memories. Jesus ******** christ.
I miss you so much.
The time you opened up to me about Michelle.
And when you said you only smoked cigz when you were really stressed.
The time you called me drunk.
...
The time you called me high. Ha ha...
The times you defended me against Zeo.
The time I got super pissed at Michelle because she hurt you so bad.
All our disney texts. Hur hur.
All the time I spent with you instead of Drew.
Your silly purple font.
Your silly profile that never changes.
Your silly picture.
Your brown skin talk2hand
Your silly obsession with hair ha ha. xDD
Your giggles and laughs.
Your voice.
Paigey Popsicle.
Hurrr.
Connur. Connie Nommie.
...Hurr..
All the laughs we shared.
All the stupid conversations we had.
The one person I trusted most.
The one person who I've let make me so upset most...
You still make my belly do flips and turns.
You still make my heart beat fast in anticipation.
For that conversation that's never going to happen...
You were a puzzle to me Connor.
You still are.
Maybe that's where I went wrong.
I over analyzed you.
I tried too hard to figure you out...
I don't know...
Atreyu makes me think of you singing Blow to me over the phone.
This Love, This Hate makes me think of us as we were.
Black Dahlia makes me think of our fights.
All Again for You makes me think of how I feel for you.
Only One makes me think of us.
The Way She Moves oddly makes me think of you ha ha.
Duality...Yeah.
And others...
Haha.
I remember when we nerded out for Pokemon.
Ha, You and your Crobat.
I'd tell you stuff that people were doing that bothered me.
Huuur. you probably have so much s**t on me its not even funny.
Secretly I liked giving you pictures.
I liked your compliments.
I'd just be like "Naaah" Cuz I didnt wanna seem conceited.
I wish I could have been more open with you.
I was starting too...And then it got crushed.
I never realized I felt so much for you..
Its scary...
Really scary...
Is this why you pushed it out..?
I can see why...
I can barely think straight..
I find no comfort in people's hollow words.
I miss you - my best friend till eternity.
I hope you read this and remember the good times.
Nah, you don't have to talk to me.
Nah, I'm not trying to prove anything with this entry.
But I'd love for you to text me.
To IM me.
To anything.
Its funny how we've all changed.
That text I sent you about hating you.
I know I can't.
I just told you that to make you happy.
You wanted me to hate you.
Or so you said.
So I did as you pleased, my little fickle Master.
Ha ha ha.
And I meant everything I said.
I wanted to let all that frustration out.
Might have not been in the best way, but it felt great.
I'm sorry if I was bitchy.
I didn't mean to be.
Being blunt is being a b***h for me, so...
You won't see this anyway so why do my confessions matter?
Who knows.
Just getting it all out I assume.
Anyway.
That is my little spill about my BFFJILL Connor.
Who I miss but won't try to reclaim because I am scared of his rejection.
Like a boss.
