• Hello there, my name is Samson. I'm no ordinary kitty, I talk and not just to myself, I'm not a weirdo you know. Okay well not all the time. I dance adn prance. I do the walk and talk strut. Being a cat may seem wonderful but it kind of makes me sad. I can't pick things up, or turn on the TV, just lay around and sit on my bum. I feel rather fat and lazy. The only fun in my day is when Missy puts food in my dish. I want to walk on two paws like people and Garfield, correction, walk on two foot mobobs, whatever those large things are called. Thingies are so confusing. The only real friend I have is Arlene, a Siamese cat. But I think she secretly hates me. My love for her is as deep as my litter box which if I may say so is quite deep. Ah the lovely smell of my urine filling the air. Missy sprayed air freshner but it made the scent a tad bit worse. I believe it's time for my afternoon nap. Now hush up I say.

    Does anyone really understand me? I feel unheard. Does anyone really want me? I feel alone. Missy seems to like her puppy better than me. Lucky is his name. Does anyone notice me? I feel invisible.

    But how could anyone not notice me? Humph. With my luxurious white fur, the occasional brown spot, the tip of my tail as white as vanilla ice cream, black on the tips of my paws, pink like salmon colored padding beneath my small explorers, my nose a beige color. I'm so adorable, right? Right, that's what I thought. I Samson am no ordinary eat. Love me, hate me, either way I know you just want to be me. Mwuhahahaha my plan to rule kittens is under way. I'm so sweet and innocent in appearance but a devilish side lies beneath. What am I? Feline or raving beast?