• When I was in middle school, I always tried to give dating a chance. I was only 14 at the time, so
    of course I was a bit experienced and naive. My cousin Kristina who was also my age seemed to
    be more into serious relationships then I had ever been. She kissed boys in the halls while I just pushed my boyfriend away childishly, as if he was my best friend. My mother knew Kristina was older mentally than physically, while I was still into cartoons and wanting to hang out with friends. I remember seeing Kristina lose her first love, which seemed unbearable. She cried for a long time, i myself could feel her heartache. I never wanted to go what she went through, and i always heard my mom say, " I'll never have to worry about Alyssa, shes always mean to them boys."
    So after the weeks i seen my cousin cry over how tragic it was to lose her first love, vowed and said," That will never be me."
    High school soon came at an instant, I was a freshman at North County. My classes were all far away in different halls, there was no group to follow anymore. I remember walking into my first class, it was foundations of art. The smell of paint stung my nose, giving me a small headache. My teacher was a tall skinny woman, thick rimmed glasses, olive green pants, and freckles the covered her nose. Ms. Gshweng was her name. I had gotten to pick my own seat. Which was quite difficult since this was my very first class as a highschooler. One table full of preps, another with immature freshman who I didn't want to get involved with, then the table with one friend i knew. His name was John, in my middle school last year. I was completely overwhelmed that I had someone to talk to. There were two other boys at the table, and with out me knowing, one of these boys would change my life dramatically. John introduced me to a boy who sat accrossed from him, his name was Charles but everyone called him Bunky.
    I sat beside him and smiled, " Hey I'm Alyssa, im a freshman here." Bunky gave me a warm smile, " Hey I'm a senior here." Knowing he was a Senior made me a little nervous, he was two years older then me. I never was use to talking to teens older then me, so i figured i'd have to make an adjustment. Months had went by, and the more i talked to him the more i grew fonder. I'd always take his house keys so that he would have to find me near the busses at the end of the day, because i felt the need to see him again. We became close, so close. We talked online, in class, in the halls. Occasionally he'd walk me to class. He was my best friend and the only thing i could talk about with my friends.
    Then the dreaded ending of the semester came, where we would switch to our new classes. He went to photography as well as I. But on different times. It killed me not being able to see him as much as i did. Art class kept us together, talking. I realized, i was in love with him, his walk, that crooked smile of his when he told me the ridiculous stories of things he had done in the past. Never have i had such strong feelings. Then in April came the school year was reaching it's end, which meant not even being able to glimpse at Bunky in the halls. I cringed at the thought.
    One night i went online, since Bunky had told me he added me on myspace. I got a message saying that he liked me, and that he thought he was below my standards since i was so beautiful. I felt butterflies in my stomach as i read each sentence. After that day, i asked him if he'd date me and he said yes with no hesitations.
    We dated for a year, I fell head over heels in love with that boy. He was everything i ever hoped for. Everything i ever needed, or so i thought. Clearly do i remember a month after our year anniversary, he all together stopped talking to me as much, no phone calls every night at 9:30 to tell me goodnight, or the sweet kisses he would give me on my forehead. The things about me on his myspace were deleted. I felt my heart begin to beat faster as i thought of reasons of why he would leave me. I gave him everything i had. My love for him was unconditional, i'd miss everyday he was away. I swore up and down that he was god sent, my gift from heaven.
    Sometimes i felt like i was over reacting but the signs were so clear. I just didn't want to believe it. Denial was my greatest downfall. My friend angel and her boyfriend Danny were worried since i was spending most of my time indoors locking myself in my room, so they took me out to get a pedicure. Bunky somewhat off my mind, i kept looking at my cellphone waiting for his text. Something he hadn't sent me for 3 days. Nor did i speak to him for 3 days. Which got me worried. Then my phone vibrated. I felt my heart leap as i grabbed the phone from the end table in the nail salon. It was from Bunky! But when i opened the text, my excitement faded. My heart fell all the way to the pit of my stomach. The text had said, " I don't want to be in a relationship anymore."
    At that moment i felt truly alone. Tears fell like bullets, my stomach tied into a knot. I cradled my head in my hands. I left the salon and went to the bathroom, Angel and Danny followed. Then i had collapsed on the floor from stress.
    My life became my worst nightmare. I lost my first love, something i vowed i would never go through. But it hit me like lightning, he was gone i would never see him again. For he didn't want to. I was mad at him. But now that i look back, i wish i could thank him. For giving the best year of my life. He shown me what true love is, without him i never would have felt it. I miss him dearly, sometimes i think of that day i met him in class, i still walk by that class today. I just smile. He'll always have a special place in my heart. And he will always be known as my first love.