• Im sitting in online ones again. I have said to my friends that they should talk to me ones a month but somehowe there isnt many that have keepet up to that.
    So i feel ones again rejected. No one actually cares what i do, where i am and is somethink major happened in my life. I know that this is just one live but still you can live it only ones. So think wice how you spent it.
    I feel so alone all the time. I have no real friend is real live but hey ho cares! Im used to this by now.
    Im used to be alone, im used to that that no one wants to be my friend, im used to that there is so much im missing becouse of some one wich i ones thinked was my friend. The one whos faul is that i dont know how to trust in peoples ones again.
    I have sittet so many times alone in school yard that i dont even remember day when i wasnt like that. I have wanted so many times to have real friends and not just watch when everyone els have there bestfriends. But after twelve years of this hell i understand that there probably isnt anyone who wants to be my friend, who cares if i feel bad, who tels me to trust her/him, who knows me inside out.
    so this is just life. One misserable life and no one cares howe i spent it. I dont want to sitt inside anymore, i dont want to feel alone, rejected, unvanted anymore. I want those twelve years back, i would want to start again in the begining. To see the mistake i did when i trusted in peoples, and take it back.
    If i just could had seen that mistake back then, i would not sit here right now and tell this to you. I would be happy somewhere, i would feel everythink what i have always wanted to feel but has been impossible.
    So to everyone who reads this i have probably gived up by this point when you read this. I have feeled so much pain and stuff no one ever should feel. Im just a empty shell in this point now.This all has just eatet me inside, slowly and painfully. I just let the pain write it self now.
    I want everyone who reads this think when they did call or talk to your friends last time? When did you do somethink funn together?
    I havent have funn whit anyone in last twelve years. No one hasnt called me in twelve year except my family members. Please dont do the same mistake that my friend did to me.
    Friends should follow you everywhere. Keep in touch, make you feel comfortable when you are sad. Friends can tell each others everythink.
    I havent had that ever, so please to my friends takes this sereoysly or i would be gone forever. then you could blame your self about this.
    The only family i have is here and if they turn me there back i dont know what to do anymore. I think i do aomethink really stubid then and might be far away from you guys.
    Keep in touch whit your friends, they mean everythink to you exspecially when you dont ever have had one... just like me...