• Some info on Poly before I get started, so that we're all on the same page:

    Polygamy - Almost universally heterosexual, where only 1 person has multiple partners.

    Polyamory - Anyone of any gender can have multiple partners—the gender of the person or their partner does not matter

    Triad - Triads are the most common form of Poly, consisting of a Primary Couple seeking out a 3rd partner (Often a Unicorn).

    Poly-Fi Triad- A closed triad relationship. They consider each other equal partners in an egalitarian triad relationship and will not have any other partners but each other. The partners will all be sexual together, as a group or in any pairing, and no pair has more power or control in the relationship than the other partner. All are equal. A Poly-Fi Triad may decide to add other partners later.

    Primary Couple/Dyads - The original couple that sought out a 3rd person, or more.

    Unicorn - A Unicorn is a bisexual woman in a Triad.

    Dragon - A Dragon is a bisexual male in a Triad.

    Unicorn/Dragon Hunting - A couple that specifically states they are looking for a Bisexual Female/Male to be with the both of them equally. (Extremely frowned up in the Poly community as it almost always leads to Couple's Privilege.)

    Couple's Privilege - Where the Primary Couple has authority over the 3rd person. The needs and wants of the couple ALWAYS comes first; While the 3rds wants and needs come 2nd. Often they set expectations and rules the 3rd is required to follow or be dumped. The 3rd is not allowed to do or say anything that will harm the relationship of the Primary Couple (Ex: doing things without one of the Primary Couple members, picking sides, picking favorites) - Doing anything to harm the relationship of the Primary Couple will cause them to dump the 3rd. This causes an unequal power dynamic, that leaves the Unicorn/Dragon as a person that is disposable on a whim.

    Polygyny - One man has multiple female partners.

    Polyandry - One woman has multiple male partners.

    Mono+Poly Relationship - A couple where 1 partner is Poly and the other is Monogamous.

    One p***s Policy: Where the man is allowed as many women as he wants, while the women are only allowed to be in a relationship and have sex with him.


    I've been somewhat exploring the Poly community for about a year or so and from what I've noticed it's a bunch of bullshit; It tends to be a very toxic community and lifestyle choice that borders on being called a 'relationship based harem/reverse harem' or even just '******** Buddies'.

    1.) Many people claim to be Poly in order to get around cheating on their partner.

    2.) Many people allow their partner to claim Poly to avoid a break up.

    3.) Many of the couples seeking a 3rd partner (triad) are older with kids, and use the 3rd partner as a free nanny and house maid that they can also have sex with; Making their life easier with free help.

    4.) Most of the couples seeking a 3rd are much older couples (40s+) seeking a younger partner just to 'Spice up their love life and keep things interesting' - Basically treating the 3rd as a sex object for their pleasure.

    5.) Some people treat Poly as a sort of 'Racial Collection System' where some people say they want to have a partner of every single race.

    6.) Some people treat Poly as an excuse to have a harem/reverse harem.

    7.) Sex addicts claim Poly as an excuse to find multiple sex partners - Faking an emotional interest in people and the community just to get laid.

    8.) Many people in the community share pictures of random/unknown 'Perfect Poly Couples that made it work' and about how they all 'want that Perfect Poly Relationship', but all they ever talk about is how jealous, lonely, left-out, insecure, begrudged, envious, and suspicious they are about their Poly partner going out on dates with new people and having sex with new people; Which really just shows they aren't actually that into the aspect of Poly because they still cling to the aspect and ideas of Mono relationships.

    9.) Many 'Poly' people force themselves to either be Poly or be ok with their partner being Poly while they stay Mono; Basically sacrificing their comfort, security, and happiness for the sake of their partners relationship 'flexibility'.

    10.) Lot's of people/couples lack basic communication skills; Almost every time you talk to them it's like filling out a job resume and just seems so formal. Some people will try to make it very clear they are the 'Dominant' in charge and will try to direct the conversation the way they see fit/get pushy.

    11.) Many people/couples are here JUST for their sexual interests; So they'll immediately start asking you for n***s or even clothed full body pics so they judge your figure, they'll send you their n***s/sexual scenes without you asking for them, they'll ask you VERY personal questions such as what age you 'discovered' yourself, if you masterbate and how, if you have sex toys, if you have kinks/fetishes, what types of sexual things you've done, ect.

    12.) Many people get into Poly because it's practically/actually a requirement for their religion; Muslim/Islamic, Mormon, some aspects of Christianity, ect. (This can also lead to forced marriages/child marriages); Not exactly so much so because of 'love and interest in Poly'.

    13.) Some people get into Poly because they're afraid to be alone/single - And even don't know who they are when they're single because they've almost never been single; So Poly becomes a way for them to always have a Plan B, C, D, E, ect. - So they always have another person to be with.

    14.) Many couples will immediately ask you to go stay with them for a while so you can test out if you like them and the situation; This is very often code meaning they want to 'test' you out sexually; Then they often say you're not a fit and dump you.

    People get into Poly for the wrong reasons the majority of the time; Often thinking this is the lifestyle they want and what will make them happy, but only end up getting hurt and hurting other people.


    More DANGEROUS aspects for WOMEN (This WARNING is for GUYS TOO, and whatever relationship dynamics are out there - But I will be referencing women because because I've been on that side of Poly)

    1.) Most Poly relationships are Polygyny; Where the man holds all the power (even if you don't realize it). Here are some MAJOR WARNINGS to look out for if you're interested in seeking a Polygyny relationship:

    A.) If he wants to fly you out to his area a couple of months after talking.
    B.) He wants to marry you after a few months of talking.
    C.) He wants you to come live with him after a few months of talking.
    D.) He wants to get you pregnant right away.
    E.) He doesn't want you leaving the house - talking to people (friends/family/neighbors)
    F.) He doesn't want you to have a job - Only to work in the house and take care of the kids while he works.
    G.) He/his partner(s) seem to be treating you a little TOO nice (often in an underhanded attempt to convince you to stay with them by implanting in your mind that life with them is better than where you were before).
    H.) He wants you to come live with him for a while to 'test out' how you like it.
    I.) His partner(s) keep asking how you feel, what do you think of him/them, pressuring you for an answer (this could be sincere questioning, but often it's the people around the 'Dominant' person who will try to implant ideas and retrieve information from you to report it back to the Dominant person so they know just what to say and do to manipulate you into staying).
    J.) He'll try to 'sweeten the deal' by saying that he'll help you in whatever goals you have; Schooling, writing & publishing, paying for other things (which makes it start to come off as more of a Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby type of relationship; Where you exchange sexual favors for money/gifts/help).

    **These are not just dangerous for obvious reasons, but also because these are all tactics used to trap women in a relationship where the power is imbalanced; Keeping you isolated from friends and family, not letting you make your own money, traps you with marriage, traps you with a kid, flies you to his area - ALL in an attempt to get you to be with him and be at his complete mercy to do whatever he says.

    This type of behavior is EXTREMELY common in the Poly community; It's very dangerous and can often lead to mental and emotional abuse**

    2.) Many men in the Poly community are very possessive of their women; They often REFUSE to allow their women to date other men or be in a relationship of any kind with other men.

    3.) Often times the man is allowed to have as many women as he wants, While the woman is ONLY allowed him; A 'One p***s Policy'. This is an unfair, unbalanced dynamic where it basically becomes a harem for him.

    4.) Many men in the Poly community are Homophobic to a double standard; They're fine with women having sex together, but are disgusted by men having sex together. They will ask their women to have sex with each other, but will refuse the slightest thing if it's the other way around. Basically stating HIS sexual interests and gratification should ALWAYS be fulfilled, while yours isn't and you just have to accept that.

    5.) Women tend to be used as status and power symbols by the men; The more women around the man, the better he looks socially to other men.


    Polygamy/Polyamory is one of the more toxic relationship-based lifestyles I've come across. Obviously more than anything the relationships that make up the majority of the Poly community are of imbalanced power dynamics and lots of sex.

    Upon first looking into it I thought it would be a really fun community where you could be in a fun mutual consenting relationship with all the people you love and everyone would be free to do as they please and it would be like being really close to a group of your best friends and everything would be fine; Such a foolish fool was I.

    The absolute POISON in this community is deadly and I'm having to consider dropping out of this community because of all the horrible Polygyny men and couples I meet and how depressing everyone is because they aren't actually happy their partner is dating someone else.

    Being in the community I've learned a lot, and the majority is based around certain types of relationships, expectations, and rules that are always set up before a 3rd even enters the relationship; Leaving no room for a mutual discussion and agreement; You're just let in and expected to obey; Like a dog.

    One of the biggest victims in the community is women, especially bisexual women; This community often treats women like they are nothing more than a ******** toy to be used for everyone's pleasure (especially men's), but their own; And then discarded like they don't matter. This is a very toxic community to be a part of if you're a woman.

    As bad as I've talked about the Poly community, don't fully let it dissuade you from it; There are some genuine good people out there who actually do want a personal relationship with multiple partners - They aren't in it for the sex or dynamic manipulation - they're in it because they do actually want to find love with multiple people; And that's ok.