Halloween is my favorite holiday, but sometimes, it can be just a downright flop. I mean, it's pretty cool if you can pull a prank that you can actually get away with, and it's fun to dress up and pretend to be this big, scary monster, or a character you've always wanted to cosplay. But do you want to know the worst job on this day? Handing out candy. I mean, come ON! Nobody likes this job, and this was the job I so (stupidly) volunteered to do. Mainly because I'm too old to go trick-or-treating, and it's no fun to sit inside when you could be scaring people.
But nothing is worse off than what I did THIS Halloween. I dressed up, which was awesome, but it was all for naught. I don't even think we had four trick-or-treaters, and that really just sucks. I spent three hours outside, sitting with a pot of candy, and people had to actually ASK me if I was handing it out. Uh... duh. It's Halloween, fscktard. Of COURSE I'm handing this s**t out. I don't just sit here with a buttload of candy for the FUN of it! And trust me, I really wanted to scream that at the third guy who asked me that.
Then there were the stares I got for being in costume. It's like people don't even know how to celebrate Halloween anymore! Seriously, I must've gotten hundreds of dirty looks just because of my giant hat. Last year, a bunch of brats made fun of it, and I almost took their candy back and told them to get the ******** off my porch. I didn't because the parents were there, but they didn't even do a damn to get their kids to leave me alone. Why is it okay for kids to make fun of people, anyway? What, do manners not exist anymore? Well, I'm just glad no one actually said anything, or I'd have hit them with my staff.
Seriously, dressing up for Halloween is one of the best parts of the day! Every year, I go as a witch, but I always go as a different kind. Last year, I was a witch-warrior hybrid, and I actually got to carry a sword around, too. That was sweet. This year, I went for a purple/black combination, and I looked adorable. But unless there are little kids around, I never see too many costumes. One idiot actually had the stupidity to tell me she was going as a pregnant teenager for the night. I literally stared at her and thought 'WTF!? Why did you need to tell me that s**t? Am I supposed to care? Or are you bragging about it?' Honestly, that's not a costume. I want to see people dressed as power rangers and Matt from Death Note. I want to see multiple Darth Vaders running around stabbing various Harry Potter characters. I really hate seeing people dressed up in sweatpants and Puma shirts and telling me it's a costume. Yeah, I'll believe it when I see those in a Halloween novelty store or a Costume outlet.
Another thing I really hate about Halloween are the pranks that are pulled. I mean, okay, TPing a tree is fun for about five minutes, but when you start scratching up cars and egging people, that's when I get pissed enough to chase after the offender and beat them over the head. Seriously, why is that their idea of fun? That never happened to me, but it did happen to our neighbors, and none of them were happy. And they're nice people, too. I wanted to hunt the assholes down and send them into the pavement for it. I can't understand why people find it fun to do that s**t when no one deserves it, but maybe that's because I've never done that, either. And I don't plan to. If I really want to cause some destruction, I'll play an hour of SimCity and set the place on fire a few times.
So, in short, Halloween just isn't what it used to be. At least, not here. But at least I got to dress up and run around the neighborhood with my dog. That part was fun, because everyone who knew me loved my costume. I still didn't get any candy, though.
Ah well, no use crying over spilled milk. Next year, I'll just dress up and sit outside WITHOUT the candy, making comments about everyone else. biggrin
That, by the way, is my awesome costume. My sister took it, though, and she can't use my camera well. That's why it's blurry.
I hope you all had a decent Halloween, but if not, feel free to rant along with me.
~ Neko
