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And in the end that's what we all are.
Isn't it?
We're always searching and dying to find something that's just right there in front of us.
Maybe its the blind people that are truly all seeing.

I hate how all we want from life is companionship and time.
But we're all just so...Afraid of one another that we run and hide.
Or we're just too prideful to show that we need someone.
We feel that it shows weakness, we want to be the ones THEY come to.

We always just want to be felt wanted, needed, loved.
Such simple things.
Why do we tremble at the thought of giving them out?

This world is so dark.
And everyone is just a darker shadow.
We have no faith in anything.

...How can we have faith in something like God - something not visible - not even tangible.
But not each other? How ******** up is that?

Humans are such interesting creatures.
Interesting but so sad.
We're always wanting something but never willing to give.

I feel sick at how dependent I become.
With you.
With them.
I know I need you guys.
That bothers me, because once you need something you can't go back to being solo.
Well you could, but it gets lonely. It gets cold. Bitterness swells up.

The feeling of needing someone but not being needed in return.
The worst feeling in the world.
All we want is to be wanted.

"Dating should be as simple as breathing."

But it never is, is it?
There's always something that chokes you up, makes you cough.
Hiccups.
I don't think it ever will be though.

People claim to know each other once they start dating.
Or when they've known each other for so long.
But I suspect there's always that deeper part to someone.
That they may not even know is there, somewhere no one will ever reach.
Locked away tightly.

I feel like I'm struggling for air.
I'm drowning in what I feel for you.
This destiny is killing me. And that's exactly what it feels like.
Everything's become so ******** up.
It'd be so simple if you'd realize something: that I'm always gonna be there, even if its not physically.
But you're too afraid, oh so afraid.

I surprise myself at how much I try for us.
At how much I work at us.
You're the first person I've felt this towards.
I think it would have been easier if we had been the same sex.
Its a constant tango with you right now.
I don't even begin to know where we stand.
What kind of 'friendship' is it when you want me to call you babe or when we just want to cuddle and kiss all night?
Is that best friends or something more?
What do you do when the one person that means the most to you, could be the person you could lose easiest?

I've tried just not dating you.
It just ends up with us both unhappy.
You with a chick I hate.
Me with a dude you hate.
Both of us off to the side flirting mercilessly.
But then when we do date something comes up.

Its not our time dear
Its not our place

How many more chances do we get, before this is something wonderful?
Before its too late and life has moved on.
I'm so afraid of losing you.

You're afraid of me disappearing.
I know for a fact because of the day I ignored you, you went balls crazy.
Why is it so hard to us to just say,

"I need you, so stay."